![]() Photo by Pavel Danilyuk from Pexels I have never been the “ideal" weight…. whatever that's supposed to mean. I matured faster than most kids and was taller than my peers until about the 7th grade. I wasn’t overweight. Just longer legs, thicker thighs, bigger hands and feet. I was constantly made aware of how I should “watch what I eat because I know my mom's side of the family is bigger" or how shapely I am. Most of my cousins were significantly skinnier than me. In high school I was bigger than most of my friends. Of course, the guys didn’t seem to mind it that much… When I joined the Air Force, I weighed more than my peers. I remember (when I aspired to be a Combat Systems Officer) my flight suit fitting when I lived in Florida. We were all in a room and I remember, with shame, telling the tailor my flight suit size. All the other ladies’ suits were a smaller size. The tailor said something like (and I’m paraphrasing) “Hey, there's nothing wrong with that size you are a woman. You have curves.” I've always been told I’m very healthy and haven’t had to many weight gain struggles until after I separated from the Air Force and “PT" (Physical Training) wasn't mandatory. Photo by Pixabay from Pexels The point, I will try to get back to my point. My point is I had a negative self-image of myself. What’s crazy is that I was healthy, I was pretty fit in my college/Air Force days, but around certain situations I would cower on the inside, anticipating others’ critique of how I lost or gained weight. “You know you got to be careful, your mom's side is bigger". Welp, it’s 2021. I have started and stopped workout plans, going to the gym, and eating healthy. While I value the benefits of a good workout, food tastes good and is more convenient. My downfall was my main motivation, to get skinner and look more fit. Not saying that those aren’t good goals but by themselves, but as a motivation they can get real superficial real quick. On days when I don’t feel like working out or eating healthy, that “image" I’m trying to achieve doesn’t matter. I will eat that extra snack or those six chocolate chip cookies, because I can. Then, when I look in the mirror and see this unfamiliar mass protruding from my waistline I remember “I should probably workout, I’m getting fat". So here I am 52 pounds heavier than I was when I started college. I want to encourage you about image for a little bit. You can't rely on other people's standard of beauty and body acceptance. You will either fail or be obsessed with accomplishing a goal you can never truly reach. You have to be content with who you are, first! Eating right and exercising is not your identity. They are things you can do to stay healthy and sure, work hard for that six pack, it’s ok. When you compare yourselves to others or what they think you should do, you are speaking death to yourself. How other people are is how God created them to be. You are not supposed to be them or have everything they have. Somebody else’s standard or opinion is an unreasonable expectation. You can't please them or consistently do so. Focus on what you can do. Take those steps each day. Find a like-minded individual like yourself who needs encouragement in this area. Motivate each other. Speak life into each other. Starting by taking it day by day IS success, no matter what anyone else thinks. If you stopped, start again, you have been blessed with an awesome opportunity at another chance. If no one else is rooting for you, I am! You can do what you choose to do. You can do what is hard. You can come back from a failure; you can start again. I pray my words bring you comfort and motivate you to keep trying. A-Leigh Ann Copyright © 2021 A-Leigh Ann ![]()
1 Comment
Malina
1/30/2022 06:31:47 pm
I love this, its something I am dealing with too and I am glad that I am not the only one. Definitely gives me some things to think about.
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